Another year older. 33 years old. Last Sunday. Grateful for everything that i have now but sometimes…. hurmmm it’s a lie if i say i never feel ungrateful of my life now. I think it is a nature as a human to feel that way. Am i right?
Reached 6th year of our marriage. Having 2 children together. Its was not a rainbow all the way. It full of ups and downs. But i hope we got stronger each day.
No celebration just cake cutting and that’s all.
My mind is not fit for writing right now. I cant put a words together. Next time i writes more okay?
It’s all started when my sister requests a cake for the Sunday school event at church. I made two cakes. Of course i happily baked my all time favorite butter cake with cream cheese filling and fresh cream frosting. But then im total failed in term of decorating. I never good on this.
But seeing those kids and adult enjoying eating the cake…its just a good feeling.
Then few days after that i baked another cake using a new recipe which i got of course from Google. I’ve tried many recipe but some just dont works for me. But this one is a success even on the first try.
I will share the recipe next time.
The reason that i baked this was just for fun and to practice on piping roses using nozzle. Not bad huh. Im satisfied!
Its look like im gonna bake my own birthday cake this year? 😂😂
It’s been a while since i really watch any drama. Nothing really captured my attention. But not until my husband show this drama for me to watch. At the first episode im not that intrested because im not fond of any historic drama scene. The only stuffs attracted to me was how the director/bts people produce the drama… omg the setting is on point!!!! Every scene is perfect!! And i only found out recently that the directer and creator of this drama is the one who create Decendents of The Sun and Goblin. No wonder!!!
As you can see the male lead is a bit old to be paired with the female lead but gosh he pulled everything perfectly! He is old but gold! Currently it’s on episode 8 and cant wait for the weekend for ep 9 and ep 10 in Netflix.
Im posting this not to show how good im as a believer and follower of God. Im far from that. And haha im not preaching but instead posting this because how great God’s grace towards me in my difficult time.
Few weeks ago i’ve been in a situation that i dont care about anything else except doing what i need to do-my obligations that i must fullfill everyday. I deliver my job as a mom and wife as i should but i still having this Im failed and im a loser feeling/thinking.
Waking up every moring with heavy heart…. it was so torturing. It’s look like that i still cling to yesterday’s event and the day before yesterday’s event. These lead to my crankiness. I cant let go stuffs. Even worst i drag past event that i should let go but i just cant. It really took away my daily joy and blessing.
I really dont like this feeling because it somehow made me to see everything negatively. I sometime loss my rational. And tend to frustrated a lot.
I really want to slap myself for being like this. I really want to cry but i just cant.
Cut story short, one night when the kids went to bed early and im about to sleep after saying my short prayer ..im about to say Amen but i feel that i should have a longer ‘talk’ with Him. That was unselfish prayer i ever had after a long time. Well i dont have to elaborate what i prayed for 😂 but it was a random prayer. I prayed whatever came cross in myind. It was quite long. About 15 minutes.
I slept after that and miraculously i woke up fresh and energetic next day.
See! Prayer is the key!
I did praying everyday but i think my selfish prayer is unheared 😂😂. I should not just praying for my wellbeing and forgetting other’s. How could God generously giving what i asked for while im not generous enough to bring others and anything that not directly related to myself in my prayer?
I just realized this yesterday. And this qoute ‘We Rise By Lifting Others’ suddenly came accross. Its relatable right?
Im glad the phase was over! I should continously and consistenly doing this hopefully!!
Anyway have a very great weekemd everyone and God Bless!!
I mean i have everything that i need. Everything is sufficient.
It’s just that my life seems a bit ..erm can i call it dull? I can’t see any rainbow. Most of the time i wanted the day to pass quickly. I spent half of the day lazying around and i even had a long nap even when my kids are not napping. I let them watch Youtube because i just want my quiet time alone doing nothing.
I hope this phase shall pass soon. I hate it! I cant be like this all the time.
I supposed to draft May and June monthly recap but i just can’t bring myself together to type. My mood has not bounced back because I fell ill last Sunday. Started with mild headache and runny nose and non stop sneezing. As usually i will not takes any medicine but it get worse the next day. Nasal congested. I have to take panadol soluable and went to bed early while i let the kids watching youtube on their phone. When i woke up to check them, both were fast asleep.
I only got better today but still with a lil bit of coughing. But im glad the annoying flu is now gone.
I’ve been so mean with the kids these few days. Oh mean mum. Recalling what i have done to them is really torturing me. Ohhhh… I can cry even.
Anyway my another happiness in disguise is on the way. Yeahhh my Jujube!! Cannot wait. 😜😜😜